Can we really believe in this change?

Right now, it is 60 degrees outside. I am inside. There is something wrong with this.

But not really.

You know, I could come on here and write about things that you've probably heard before only with a controversial twist, or I could write about new things also with a controversial twist. It's controversial because all belief can be disputed, especially that of a missionary because they're displaying their beliefs openly to others in the hope that they will find something to hold on to.

I could come on here and tell you outright that one belief is wrong and another is right, only I'd be lying to you because honestly, I have no clue. Seriously. My beliefs are fact to me, but not to someone else. My faith is my life, but it may not be the life of others. So what I say on here is what I believe, only I'm desperately hoping that there's something in it that another can grasp with as much passion as I attempt to have. (Key word being "attempt".)

I guess I could write about how 2010 is ending and a new year is beginning and that we should all try to act as amazing as possible to please God!

Except I don't believe that. I gave up on New Year's Resolutions a long time ago because I realized that it was pointless to try and change myself if A- God wasn't ready for me to and B- I wasn't ready for me to. I'm not saying that New Year's Resolutions never result in some good, but most of the time, they set you up for disappointment when there is enough disappointment in the world already. "This year, I'm going to lose 20 pounds!" "This year, I am going to volunteer more!" "This year, I am going to be nicer!"

Now, that's all fine and dandy if you're ready for it. But to me, New Year's Resolutions only spur premature change that can end up in disaster. Sure, some good can come out of it, but then the next year comes, and you remember that you didn't meet your resolution from the year before, so you cling to the hope that you'll do better this year.

Don't change yourself unless you seriously feel moved to (aka, unless it comes from God). Our flaws spur lessons, and those lessons spur changes, and so on. It's a circle. When it comes to making changes, it comes down to that circle. Not "Oh, everyone else has a New Year's Resolution, I should too!" Don't jump on the bandwagon here, people. It's not worth it.

Maybe some of your resolutions have come true in the past. Maybe you've forgotten them all. But this whole "New year, new me!" philosophy is honestly a load of poop. One day should not spur change, every day should. Maybe that's confusing, I'll try to explain.

If a change is meant to happen, it will happen. I'm not saying this won't require any effort, but change should be something that has been building up. Once it builds up, it overflows slowly. Every day changes you, and with that attitude, you wind up changing the atmosphere of every day.

The only time I can honestly say that I was drastically changed was when I was Saved. Before then, I was pretty much stagnant. I never changed, and it showed. The second I was Saved, I was different. Everyone could tell.

Now, not all changes have to be like that. That change was seriously a long time coming because God had a huge plan for me. That change spurred a never ending chain of changes, changes that are occurring as we speak. (Well, technically, as you read, but I digress.)

Ever since that moment, I have been a constantly moving and constantly shifting human being. I don't go two days as the same person. That change was started by God, and the changes that result shall start and end by God's hand.

Drastic changes are very rare, and that is another factor of how being Saved is so magnificent. It's a drastic change that steals your breath, but in a very good way. Changes like that aren't commonplace. But what I've found is that after a change like that, you are raw. You're wide open.

The changes that occur after that are slow, and they paint the colors on your empty canvas. Everything shapes you, and you start to shape everything in return. God doesn't want us to be stagnant. He loves us enough to want to change. He changes us, because we are truly stagnant beings without Him. Humans are stuck in their ways, and it takes God to break us of that habit, whether you realize it or not.

Change can be scary, I admit that. But is there any greater or more beautiful process than seeing someone grow into who they will become? I don't think so.

So if your New Year's resolution is occurring through God, awesome! But be careful. Don't lie to yourself and say that God is doing it if He isn't. I've told myself those lies before, and it hurts. It hurts you and it hurts those around you. When it comes to a process like change, we have to be careful. Don't be reckless with who you are. God put effort and serious thought into creating you. He knows the changes that need to be orchestrated, not you.

Change is not a bad thing, but it can be dangerous when used recklessly. I can say this from experience. Now this isn't an "I know more than you do" post. This is an "I am thinking out loud" type of post. So by all means, disagree if you want. I'm always up for a good discussion :)

I've said my peace. I'm going to go outside and enjoy this glorious weather.